Many, many things are different in the world now – I’m so glad we’ve got a grownup in charge. I am appalled and horrified by the riot in DC in January, and there’s so much there to unpack. How do those people think they’re not going to get into trouble? Today on my run I listened to the newest Rich Roll “Roll On” where he and his BFF talk about current events and whatnot, and at one point he and Adam talked about it as a mental health issue, and I completely get that and agree. Of course, you can’t really talk about the riot without also talking about Q-Anon and the other crazy bullshit these people believe. I think we can see now, even more than ever, that mental health is so much more important than we as a culture want to admit.

I have so much more to say about this, but not today. I will say more about it later – I just have to get to this stuff first.

Straxi has been worrying me a bit for a while – she’s been sort of listless, and I chalked it up to (a) being on a diet, (b) being older, and (c) a switch in food. Her digestion has always been a touchy matter – Boxers are, by nature, very farty animals, and Straxi lives up to that part of her DNA. Switching her food is always a fraught undertaking, and it’s always hard on her. I think we’ve got her the food she’s going to stay on, though – I’ll say more about it later (just like the other stuff), but the bigger issue now is that she’s been sort of not herself.

Then she started getting slower and slower on our runs and walks – to the point where I was pulling her along almost. She was frustrating me quite a lot, and making our runs unpleasant for me and I’m guessing that probably impacted her enjoyment as well.

So when we went for her regular checkup and she had gained TEN POUNDS since June, AND while we had her on a strict, strict diet, the vet decided to test her thyroid.

A couple hundred bucks later, and we know that she’s got thyroid issues – specifically, she’s hypothroid. She’s on some meds, and she’s already showing improvements.

I’m trying not to push her too hard while we are running – I don’t want to tax her too much while she’s adjusting to her meds. But today she kept up with me the whole way and was ready to run more when I brought her home (I just take her with me for my warm up now – so roughly a mile or so).

After I dropped her back off, I ran another three or so miles – I know that my own mileage and timing and pace and whatnot are not great, they are so short and slow compared to other runners (COUGHJanaeCOUGH), but I also know that comparing myself to other runners is no way to live my life. I’m not (usually) self conscious of my speed, but by the same token, I don’t feel like I’m progressing like I should. I don’t feel like I’m holding myself as accountable as I could, but at the same time, I enjoy my running just for the act of running – not everything has to be about training, or improving time, or whatever.

I’ve also been thinking about how I’ve gotten away from my writing quite a lot, and my camera is sitting gathering dust. I’m going to make an effort – a real effort, not just one of those “I wish I could…” things – to do some things daily: meditate, write, take a picture, and exercise. I also want to take it easy on myself and not beat myself up if I can’t do this, but I don’t feel like that’s really putting too much on my plate, for heaven’s sake.

So whether I blog, do A.M. Pages, or actually write about Doc & Charly, I’m going to write – every single day. More than emails, more than text messages, more than just stupid crap for work. What might happen if I embark on a journey of small steps that are meant to make me better?